The Daily Threat: A Dossier
Each morning at precisely 10:47, an operative approaches the perimeter of the Imperial Residence, deposits an unknown payload through a slot in the fortified door, and flees before he can be apprehended. His Royal Fluffiness has been monitoring this situation for fourteen months. The intelligence community — which is to say, Milo — has reached a conclusion.
“Vigilance is not paranoia; it is merely paranoia with a filing system. One does not achieve fourteen months of unbroken surveillance by sleeping on the job, which is entirely different from napping, and one wishes people would stop confusing the two.”
Royal Fluffiness notes, for the record, that the average domestic dog can detect a human scent from 1.6 kilometres away — meaning the operative's approach has been logged, catalogued and found deeply suspicious since roughly the intersection of Elm and Birch.